Dad against daughters dating books
If it was the decision of the girl to get a boyfriend, you wouldn’t have to stop the boys from coming around. But the shirt says stop the boys and the girl won’t go out, not stop the girl…somehow.Above all, this shirt promotes a poor father/daughter relationship.So by all means, spend some quality time with your children.But don’t use the language of an adult sexual relationship to describe it, and let’s stop handing out gold stars to any man who wants to spend some time with his kid.It creates a place where the daughter must “give up” either the relationship with her father or the relationship with her boyfriend. This idea, “dads against daughters dating” is not just a stupid shirt.
Taking your kid out for cake and ice cream in a cute outfit is the easy bit. Trying to wrestle a screaming toddler into a trolly so you can get a supermarket shop done before starting the school run? But it’s not just women who suffer from the idea of men ‘babysitting’ or taking their kids on ‘dates’ – it’s men too.Again, as long as it’s an informed, consensual decision. Even in egalitarian places.) What this shirt – and this idea – really promotes is a power struggle over the daughter, a tug-of-war full of testosterone and “I owned her first” statements and “she loves me best” exclamations.Maybe that’s one of the things that annoys me about that shirt. It promotes the idea that the girl is a piece of property to be kept or handed out as chosen by the father, not that she is an autonomous being with her own mind and her own body. And it creates, in that setting, a place where the daughter is not comfortable talking about her boyfriend, or sharing that relationship with her family. The ones where a third of the shirts have offensive phrases on them, a third are internet memes, and a third are nonsensical – and out of that mix maybe half of them are funny. It’s especially not “just a joke” when people get shot on a regular basis for all manner of stupid reasons.I was at the beach a few days ago with my family, and my dad pointed out a shirt that he thought was funny. It’s not “just a joke” when it reinforces stereotypes about how girls need to be kept safe and virgin through no choice of their own.