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But, ironically, through choosing to get involved with yet another "inappropriate" guy, I came full circle back to my heart.It made me realize that while many people choose to shut down and close their hearts forever rather than feel pain again, I'm ready to not only open mine and share it with someone once more, but to also make better choices in I'm going to share it with.That's not to say that it's common for a 25-year girl to date a 60-year-old man.What is common though is for 20 year old women to date men in their 30's and 30 year old women to date men in their 40's and so on. Many young and modern women shun the thought of adopting the role as a mother figure and household provider.Not only is that the way for it to grow, but also the only way you can truly get to experience the joy of real connection with another person. When two people are just in different places in their lives with regards to relationships, then it's just the way it is, and there is nothing you can do about it.
I think one reason it was so stress-free and enjoyable is because I was present in each moment.A month or so ago, I stopped seeing a much younger guy.Because he's only 23, I went into it without any expectations.This doesn't mean not to be clear on what you want from a relationship or partner, no way. This is a realization I've been fighting against accepting for years.It just means managing the age-old paradox of staying true to what you want big-picture for your life while still being present in each moment and not attached to the outcome. I have spent way too much time making excuse after excuse for men I've dated, thinking that if I were just better or more awesome, or if I waited long enough, he would become "ready" for the same things that I am ready for... But finally, through dating this younger guy, it sunk in -- it's actually not about me!
My energy wasn't spent worrying about whether it was going to go anywhere and when/if it was going to end. As much as I hate to admit it, when I've gone into dating someone in the past who I thought had the potential to be something serious, I've started putting pressure on it. We become so caught up in the of what that relationship could be rather than getting the chance to see if that person or that relationship is something we even want. If you're not worried about it ending or where it's going, then you're not worried about doing anything that might mess things up, so you're just completely yourself, like I was with him.